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that contains a small vial, packed in newspapers and surrounded by sty- rofoam. It looks really cheap. It isn’t. One time, I actually laughed out loud when the cardboard box was deliv- ered. It was decorated with a picture of a big stork carrying a baby printed on the side. Nothing like letting the neighbors think they know what you’re doing. One time, I cried when I opened the box. The vet had not added any extender and there was nothing, absolutely nothing, inside the vial. Those of you who have been unfor- tunate enough to use this method also realize that there’s a serious time factor involved and a shipment that is useless can set a breeder back by six months. The only other time I cried over a shipment was when the shipment never arrived. Somehow, some way, someone at the vet office had addressed this precious (read: expensive) shipment to themselves, only to find it on their own doorstep in the morning. While my bitch and I sat waiting at a reproduction vet office 3,000 miles away. That was the first and only time I used a repro vet, by the way. And a good thing it was. Due to severe snow storms, which even I couldn’t navi- gate, a holiday which FedEx didn’t navigate on, and a slow rise in proges- terone/LH counts (are you confused, those who wisely don’t breed? Read: expensive blood tests, letting science take out the guesswork of the per- fect day)—we were down to the last possible day. Plan B for shipping kicked in. A sec- ond shipment was sent to the correct address and my bitch was implanted surgically. (Read here: Huge ex- pense. this operation is the same as a C-section in reverse.) Success! Two puppies. (Read: expensive c-section as these pups were huge on the expen- sive ultrasound and expensive x-ray.)
Oh, and now that puppies are “on the ground”—time to pay the stud fee. I could go on and on, but won’t. I’ll save all the rest of the breeding things for another time. Right now I’ll cut to the chase and the topic of this article—names. Yes, puppies are cute and fuzzy and smell delightful. Yes, they are somuch fun to cuddle and kiss. But the best part about puppies? They need names and the breeder gets to pick them. This is the best part. Seriously. The next time you read the names—and I mean all of the “official AKC regis- tered names”—stop and think for a moment. Someone, a breeder 99.9% of the time, had to think of that name. And they thought of it with a purpose, a reason, a definite goal in mind. (And a drink in hand, I’m thinking.) Believe me, these names are carefully worked on. Sometimes for days, months and in a few cases with folks who collect names, years. I was almost overwhelmed and ready to throw in the towel the first time we had a litter. It took me weeks. I fi- nally settled on using the alphabet as a helpful tool (crutch). We simply started with A and after we got to to Z we started all over again. Simple, you say? Think about it. Think about U, X, Y and Z. Dwell on Q, for a while. Staying away from the expected is not easy. We chose Una, Xanthippe, Yard- ley, and Zucca. And the Q pup became a gorgeous belge dog named “Q”. The most recent litter we whelped (went into debt over) landed back on the letter “E”. Easy. My parents have both recently left thisEarth, but theirmiddle names began with E. So... we’ve got an Evan- geline and a Eugene. Stunning babies with super special names. I won’t go so far as to say choosing names makes breeding all worthwhile, but I will say it can make part of it a lot of fun.
YES, PUPPIES ARE CUTE AND FUZZY AND SMELL DELIGHTFUL. YES, THEY ARE SO MUCH FUN TO CUDDLE AND KISS. BUT THE BEST PART ABOUT PUPPIES? THEY NEED NAMES AND THE BREEDER GETS TO PICK THEM. THIS IS THE BEST PART. SERIOUSLY. THE NEXT TIME YOU READ THE NAMES—AND I MEAN ALL OF THE “OFFICIAL AKC REGISTERED NAMES”— STOP AND THINK FOR A MOMENT. SOMEONE, A BREEDER 99.9% OF THE TIME, HAD TO THINK OF THAT NAME. AND THEY THOUGHT OF IT WITH A PURPOSE, A REASON, A DEFINITE GOAL IN MIND.
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42 • T op N otch T oys , O ctober 2021
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